Jerry Jones Bought Himself A Helicopter Because That's What Rich Old Bastards Do
[object Object] We all know Jerry Jones loves the finer things in life: tailored suits, his state-of-the-art football stadium, feeling up women in bathrooms. Now we can add “shooting pigs out of a helicopter” to that list.
Jones has been showing off his new personal helicopter, which he uses to travel from the Cowboys’ headquarters in Frisco to the stadium in Arlington, to the local media. He wants everyone to know that the helicopter is a finely adorned and luxurious aircraft—it has a custom paint job and has “extraordinary power,” according to Jones—and also that he is free to use it for any crazy-old-man activities he can think of:
At first I thought Jones was just bullshitting, because hunting pigs doesn’t seem like a thing that people do anymore. Then I realized that Jerry Jones is exactly the kind of dude who would maintain a herd of pigs so that he may slaughter them from the sky.
Anyway, the ‘copter seems nice:
- NHL Picks for Tuesday: Best Bets for Lightning vs. Canadiens and Ducks vs. Penguins
- College Basketball 2025-26 National Title Contenders Best Future Bets
- Eagles vs Chargers Monday Night Football Betting Prediction: Week 14 Bet Picks
- NBA Best Bets Today: Sunday Dec. 7th Top NBA Picks
- Texans vs Chiefs Sunday Night Football Betting Prediction: Week 14 Bet Picks
- Top 10 NFL Player Props for Week 14: Best Bets and Expert Picks
- College Football Conference Championship Best Betting Picks, Predictions

